Five Days Later

I have had a few days to try to process the 8 days we spent in Managua. I was really hoping to come to grips with the emotions and reactions of what we saw there. However, what I have discovered is that I am in a sort of grieving process. Initially, I was shocked and sad. Then, I was outraged. Now, I'm numb. However, the tears can still flow freely when I think about the 450 children we came into contact with. My heart jumps at the thought of going back. I get a huge smile on my face when I think about praising Jesus in Spanish with 3000 other believers I have never met, yet was intricately bonded with.

As I have mentioned before, Nicaragua is a paradox. The hopelessness of poverty is always present and heavy. Young girls under the age of 12 will prostitute themselves to the trash truck drivers at the dump for the opportunity to be first to dig through the trash. Children beg for money at every street corner. I met Udy, a boy about 12, who had been kidnapped and taken to Mexico so that his organs could be sold on the black market. By the pure grace of God, he escaped before he was killed. David, also about 12, was sold by his mom's boyfriend for a $2 crack rock. He was rescued by Wayne and Elaine, wonderful missionaries in Managua.

And yet, the presence of God is everywhere. Udy is in the constant process of healing. He is guarded, but liberal with hugs. David is a born leader and understands the depths of God's love. The Church in Managua is filled with true Christians. They suffer persecution. They give out of nothing. Their joy in the Father is just that. They have trouble, but rely on their Lord to deliver them. While the Church in the US has about a 20/80 tithe rate (that is 20% of believers contribute 80% of the church's budget) the church we visited has an 80% tithe rate. I don't like numbers when it comes to the kingdom of God, but these numbers speak volumes. Those that have much tend to give little and those that have little tend to give much. I am now praying for much that I may give much.

I'm amazed at the way Father put our mission team together. While I knew all 8 of my fellow members, I didn't know them. I have been touched deeply by each one of them. Cheryl, Claudie, Bradley, Brooks, Chad, Jay, Jason, and Russell: How can I thank you for the way you took me in and made me family? I want each of you to know that I thank our Father for you and for the amazing gifts you bring to the table. I know that all week we prayed that we would have Jesus's heart for the people that we met. On Thursday, we learned how dangerous that prayer is. As we walked through a children's cancer hospital, we saw children who were dying in terrible conditions and victims of extremely inadequate medical care. Each one of us was wrecked with sorrow. And yet, as we prayed for these children, there was hope because we felt the Father's love for even the least of these. One image I will never forget is the little two year old girl vomiting on the floor as her mother tried to hold her head up. No bed pan. No nurse. No sheets or pillows on the bed. I was compelled to pray for her. As I did, she relaxed and stopped vomiting. She turned her beautiful eyes up and smiled! I cried and she smiled. Crud. I'm crying now. How much God loves each and every one of us. And how much the children of Nicaragua need to know about His love!

Our friends, Wayne and Elaine MaGouirk and their ministry, Savior's Tear, are truly the hands and feet of Jesus to hundreds of children in Nicaragua. They don't do it for glory. They certainly don't do it for the money (there's no wealth building in missions). They simply do it because God told them to. I'm going to post the link to their ministry at the end. PLEASE visit the page. It is such important work. I have learned over the past few days that our Father blesses those who bless His children. And He certainly blessed me last week.

I think that I can speak for the entire team when I say that we are all forever changed by this trip. Our vision is different and our hearts have been altered. We experienced a compassion unlike I have ever known.

I have made lifelong friends and have met an entirely new family in Central America. Thank you for following our journey. I have linked to Mission 2540, Brooks Boyett's ministry blog as well. He does a great job with it and has a fantastic ministry as well. Please check it out.

Father, thank you that you don't turn away from us. Your love is always present and your grace covers us all. Please help us to recognize the opportunities to be You to others. Help us not to be distracted by our own selfishness and greed. Even the widow gave out of her need. May we give out of our abundance. Amen.

Savior's Tear

Mission 2540

Coming Soon

I've had several people hit me up on Facebook about if or when I am going to blog more about the trip. Honestly, I'm so spent and so much happened that I think it's best if I take a few days and process everything and then post a final thoughts type entry.

However, the China trip is set in stone-we purchased airline tickets last night. Thank you all for your prayers and support for the Nicaragua trip as well as our future in China. Blog soon!!

Hope for a New Day

This has been an emotional ride like I have never known. There is so much to love about the country of Nicaragua-it's beautiful and the people are great. The fact of the matter is, however, there has not been a stable government here in recent history. Most coups tend to take over and then plunder the country for every speck of hope that is left. The average monthly income is between $125 and $150. When you go to the mall, the prices are only slightly lower than American prices. Do the math. The malls are still open, which means somebody is buying, but at $150 US dollars, it's not the average Nicaraguan. The government is the same. The officials are the ones with all the money.

Enough said about that. Today, we started out at a hospital for children with cancer. It was so powerful to pray for these kids and watch the Father fill them up with hope. It was moving to see the mothers with tears in their eyes looking at their children and realizing that there really is hope in sorrow. The hospital is a terrible place. There is no doubt that the staff does all it can for the kids, but it's a socialized system and they have NO supplies. While we were there, we saw a young boy who had fallen out off a tree and had massive head injuries. He didn't have cancer, but they don't have a head trauma facility. His system was shutting down and he needed an enema, but the doctor said there are no enemas at the hospital. In fact, they have very few supplies at all. We bought the enema from a pharmacy for this boy. Not to get political here, but this is what you get when you have national health care. No government can run it efficiently and free of corruption. The result is understaffed, under skilled, under equipped, overworked health care systems and children die in the fallout.

This afternoon was one of the most incredible times I've had here. We went to an orphanage that has around 30 kids. I wanted to take every one of them home.. They were so full of life and joy and love. Just another time when I was blessed by the ones I thought I was going to help. After playing all afternoon, we had some worship time with them. As we were about to leave, the kids all gathered up and began to thank us and prophesy over us. It was incredibly moving and sweet. I can never get enough of those hugs.

This country is a paradox. On one corner is the specter of human trafficking. Across the street miracles are taking place and hope is being born. I'm going to leave a huge part of my heart here when I leave.

Please take the time to check out http://www.saviorstear.com. This is an incredible ministry here and is run by some fantastic, Godly people.

Actually, it's Day 3

Today was the last day of our time at the school in Managua. I came here with the lofty idea that I had blessings to give these children. However, they are the ones with so much to offer. They are smart, funny, energetic and just amazing. In fact, I am the one who has been blessed beyond measure by these little lights.
What is most amazing to me is the fact that these kids are throw-aways. I can't understand how these kids can be ignored. Wayne and Elaine are doing a phenominal job at Escuela Christiana Oasis de Esperanza. They are educating a new generation of warriors. I'm not a socialist by any means, but the government here has failed the people and so have we as the Church.
I don't know what you're doing right now, but if you ask me (and you did, didn't you?) you should find a way to get some supplies or money or your butt down here.
"Not me" you say? I say, "Who, then?"
If we can't help even the least of these, then what good are we to the kingdom of God? That's right-I said it. Tell me what good? I didn't want to preach or lecture, but our level of assistance as the richest "Christian" people in the world is pitiful. I meant pathetic. I'm also at fault. We all are. I hear you now..."We can't save everybody". Oh YES, we can!! We have never tried because we are too fat, lazy, slothful, confortable and selfish. I'm going to throw arrogant in here too, because I'm talking to myself also. Sorry if this offends you (not really), but I need to be offended and so do you. Don't want to come to Central America? In Amarillo, there are people living under overpasses downtown by Faith City Mission. I know because I drive past them every day and thank God that I'm not one of them. Can you get downtown for a while and speak to them? Pray with them? Feed or clothe them? I'm dead serious. Can you? More to the point-WILL YOU?

I'll try to make the next post happier, but I can't promise anything.

Father, give us your heart for ALL people, regardless of who they are. Show us how you love them as much as you love us. Open our hearts to you and your desire for us to be your hands and feet.

Day 1 recap

Today was the most amazing day. It's so incredible how loving these kids are. I'm not ministering as much as these kids are ministering to me. They have no idea they are missing anything and the more time I spend with them, I realize that I am the one who's missing something. Love, compassion, contentment. They have it all.

We took a tour of the dump ground where most of these kids live and find their meals. The city will often dump the garbage on the sidewalks of this neighborhood so the residents can go through it before it is burned. I didn't take pictures of the dump because we felt it would be disrespectful. I don't want people taking pics of my house...Anyway, it left quite an impression on us. Most of the children at the school show up everyday in clean clothes and combed hair (although they may not leave the school that way because they are kids, after all) and we are amazed that the parents can get these kids so clean in such horrendous conditions.

I love my kids with all my heart. I never knew I had any more room to love more, but today, 300 more kids stole my heart.

Day 1

Arrived in Managua yesterday. When we landed, the first thing we noticed were all the crashed and disabled aircraft littering the side to the runway. Ghostly. And the city has proven to be ghostly as well. The presence of God is very strong here, but so is the evil. I feel one bolstered and ready on one side and like I'm about to be torn apart on the other side. The spiritual battle is very thick here. I imagine that it is not unlike Haiti. And yet, everywhere I look, I see the love of the Father on these people and I feel him crying for them. As Isaiah said, "I am undone!"

I have no idea what this week holds, but I do know that the Father did not send me here to be me. I must walk in the spirit every second that I am here or I will fall victim to an attack of the enemy.

I ask that if you read this, pray that we have the eyes of the Father to see the Nicaraguan people as he does, His wisdom to discern what is from Him and what is not, His heart to love the ones that are around us, and His power that we may spread the kingdom with every step that we take.