How Could I?

This post is a reply I posted on a friend's blog. I have linked to it so you may see her post and why I wrote what I did.

When Heather and I decided to follow our calling and go to China, we heard all kinds of comments. Most were encouraging, but many were not. Even my own grandmother, who reads the Bible every day, asked why I would "do something so stupid" as to take my children to a foreign country. Here is my answer:

First of all, don't you know the Gospel? Did you conveniently forget that part that says "go into all the world?" Did you add the words "if you are called"? to the end of that passage? Guess what? That passage is directed at you! How can you take all of Jesus' other commandments literally but assign this passage to only those special few who have been called to missions?

There is nothing as satisfying as being in the manifest presence of the Father. If you have never experienced the tangible love of God, when it's so thick in the room that you can hardy stand, then you haven't experienced Him! And, trust me, it's not because He is withholding from you.... When you have been in His presence, obedience is not a demand on your life, it is the deepest desire of your heart! That love makes you trust Him with a reckless abandon-at least it feels like reckless abandon. But, Father has plans to prosper us, not harm us. That's not to say that his will is safe. It's not! He's not a God of status quo. He's the God of extraordinary! And He has called us to do extraordinary things!

Imagine how Peter felt when he laid hands on the man at the gate called "Beautiful". This man had been there for 40 years and had been passed many times by Jesus himself! Yet, it was Peter who was used by the Spirit to heal the man. Now, that's amazing!

I also remind people that in the tongue is the power of life and death! I didn't make this up. It's in the Bible! Proverbs 18:21 to be exact. It's not just "if you can't say anything nice"...Your words can actually create or destroy life! Didn't God speak the world into existence? Didn't He establish the ministry of Jesus with words? Isn't Jesus, in fact, the Word of God? Think about that. Why would you speak death over what God has ordained? Words matter. Stop tearing down the Father's will that none should perish!

This is all about relationship. You may think you have a relationship with Jesus, but if you can't feel His heartbeat for the nations, you don't know Jesus! You know about Jesus. Even the demons acknowledge who He is, but they don't walk in His will.

Father, I pray that You get the glory, that You get the fame. I pray that we realize that we were created for Your good purpose, not ours. I pray that hearts are opened to your love and how that moves us to live in open abandon of our own well being and safety. I thank you that Jesus didn't put His safety above our need for his blood!

Now That We're Back...

We have returned from our wild adventure to the far east. Jet lag to and from China is a bear. I've been home for 3 days now and I have yet to sleep more than 4 hours. I'm hoping it gets better tonight because I'm functioning less efficiently than I should.

It's strange to be back. I feel like I'm between worlds. Part of me is here and part of me is there. I'm still processing everything from the trip. This is going to be a long process. As our time in China unfolded, we realized that God was only revealing the next step as it became necessary. Nothing has changed. He is still doing that. The next step for us is to get out of debt. We have found that it is very difficult to go into missions when you have financial obligations at home. However, we still have very few answers as to what and when in regard to our ministry and yet, we don't feel like one second of this trip was wasted. Some purpose was served-we just can't see it.

I want to say that we have met some of the most incredible people during the last month-people who have a heart for God. They took us in and made us family immediately. They are generous and loving and we hope to see them again. Whether that's in China, the U.S., or heaven, we don't know, but we will never forget them!

I don't think you can imagine how big of a step it is for a family to go abroad and live. Missions requires a very special kind of faith-faith in God, faith in your supporting churches, faith in yourself. Please pray for those that give up so much to advance the kingdom. It isn't enough to put a few bucks in the plate when you hear a presentation on missions. It really takes serious prayer covering also. Please lift these courageous people up. Also, please pray for China. What a wonderful place and how much God loves the people there! The Gospel is spreading like wildfire throughout the country. Praise God! Please pray for us as we take the next step. And wait to discover the step after that.

What I've Learned To This Point

I've learned some things about myself this week. If you don't believe in spiritual warfare, STOP! You don't want to read the rest of this. If you do believe in it, but don't want to hear about my own battle, STOP! This is all about spiritual battles.

I am a weak and sad christian. I took the armor of God for granted and learned that I have a bunch of chinks and holes in mine. I came over here thinking that I would just open my mouth and the life of God would just spill out. That would be great except I haven't even been able to feel His presence here. At home, I just hear a song or go to church or read a book and the Father's speaking to me. But here-nothing. I started to freak out a little. Ok. A LOT. Did God not come with us? Had He sent us over here alone? How can I be expected to have vision for His people when I can't even have vision for my own life? I think it's really stupid to even consider making the move here if I can't hear what the Lord has to say about it. I found myself in the middle of a battle I never could have even imagined.

I have suffered from depression for most of my life (another story for another time), but haven't had to deal with it for over 3 years. It crept up on me this week and smacked me upside my tired, sick head. I just realized it yesterday-while I was getting over a terrible case of food poisoning. As if that wasn't enough, I have had an impossible time getting over jet lag. Given my lack of sleep schedule for the last 15 years (I work on call), you would think that jet lag would be a non-issue. Another misconception. This country is full of these little misconceptions. Needless to say, I haven't been able to get a handle on life this week.

I say all of this to illustrate how the enemy has just lambasted me this week. I thought I was prepared for this place, but the principalities of darkness were laying in wait-ready for me. He exploited every weak and exposed part of my very limited armor. Before we came, our family at home prayed for us and a dear friend made the statement that we should expect to encounter spirits that we had never seen or dealt with before. That was a good word. I should have remembered it. I certainly do now.

I've always told people that I am not a daily Bible reader. "That's just not me" I would say. That was incredibly stupid! Here, I have to plug myself in every chance I get. As I type, I am listening to Jake Hamilton and I appreciate the fact that my spirit is rising up in praise and worship to the Father. I'm learning. I've spent some time on my knees, my face, my feet, weeping and dancing before my Daddy. He has fought and won the battle against the spirits of this world, but I CANNOT walk in that victory until I learn to exist every moment in His presence.

I'm learning to walk with a heart that expects to experience the violent invasion of heaven into the earth. I'm learning that when you've spent time in the presence of our Glorious Father, you are never the same. You cannot be the same. There's a violence in my heart to see His Kingdom invade our reality. I've been marked by Him for a purpose-an eternal purpose. So have you. It doesn't matter if you know it or believe it. It's the reality of your existence and mine. We were created to advance His purpose and our reward is to sit at His feet in eternal worship.

Father, You are good! Thank you for making me for Your glory. Invade my space and rip my reality apart. Tear down the walls and let your glory walk in. Change our perception from this temporal existence to an eternal reality!

Rabbit Legs and Donkey Dumplings

What an incredible few days it has been. We got off the plane and we were immersed in strangeness. Trust me. If you have never been here, you've never seen anything like it. Neither have I. This city is a teir 2 city, meaning it is like a mid-sized city in the US. Think Oklahoma City, Kansas City, you get the picture. However, here, a mid-sized city has 5-10 million people. This city has 6 million. High-rise apartment buildings are going up everywhere. They can't build them fast enough. The population boom can be attributed to foreign companies setting up shop here. Many expatriates (non Chinese citizens) are coming in. Commerce is exploding and so is the city.

Yesterday, we had our first chance to meet with our entire new family here. I got to speak and it was just amazing. I can't begin to tell you how nervous I was. My voice shook and cracked. My heart was racing and my hands were cold and sweaty. It was almost like when I asked my wife to marry me. Yep. I was that nervous! How kind and gracious they were. Every week, there are more people than the week before. Last week, there were 35 people or so. Yesterday, we had 67!! I wasn't expecting such a large crowd. That might have had something to do with the nerves. After our fellowship, we went to a beautiful park and had a picnic and Easter egg hunt. It was cold and rainy, but a wonderful time.

Last night, we were treated to a dinner on the town and we got to experience a few of the local favorites: rabbit legs and donkey dumplings. They are exactly what they sound like. The dumplings are like the dumplings you get at a Chinese restaurant except these are stuffed with donkey meat. Let me tell you-they are delicious! You cannot even imagine.

Today, we took a road trip to the mountains about 3 hours north of the city in hopes of hiking. But, it was raining and cold by the time we got there. We had to turn around. The mountains are incredible. We couldn't see them very well because it was so foggy and hazy, but they are majestic. The thing about China is, unlike what we are used to, you can't just call ahead and find out weather and other information at the places you plan to visit. It's hit and miss. You might get there and the park is closed for maintenance or something. It's totally different than what we are used to.

I mentioned that it was hazy. That's because today is Tomb Sweeping Day. It's sort of like our Memorial Day. The Chinese burn "money" as a way to send their dead relatives money in the afterlife. Now imagine millions of people burning stacks of paper and then shooting off fireworks and you can see where today's smoggy conditions come from.

I'm going to try to post some pictures with my next entry. We haven't downloaded any onto the computer yet. Thank you all for your prayers and please continue to lift us up as we have some huge decisions to make in the next few days.

Overwhelmed

We have arrived in China. I have been all over the world, but I was not prepared for China. There are many reasons for this. One of them is the food. They don't waste one piece of an animal. The smells are strange and wonderful. The people are so kind. And, I am so lost. This place is so big. I am so small. Culture shock has set in. Heather is loving it because it brings back so many good memories of her childhood in the Philippines.

We have also been overwhelmed by the love and support from our family over here. We arrived to a full pantry of "American" snacks delivered by our many new friends here. Let me tell you, those snacks are a luxury over here. They are expensive. And we are so grateful that they honored us in this way. It's amazing to us that these 20 or so people have been praying for us for months. We just don't have words to describe the way they have honored us over and over again.

This is Easter Sunday-our first meeting with our new friends. I pray that the Spirit speaks through me this morning. I have preached before, but to be honest, it was 18 years ago and I simply used bits and pieces of other sermons I had heard. This is different. I pray for a fresh word from the spirit-one that is relevant to us here, in this place and time.

I must also mention that Heather and I feel the prayers of our family in Amarillo. We are deeply thankful that so many people love us and care so much for us. We are still processing everything and there are still so many things that we do not know. If not for these prayers and our Father responding in kind, we would be lost here.
But, this journey is not about me. It is about our risen Lord, a Father who cried tears over our condition and sent a huge piece of himself to be killed so that we could be redeemed. We are redeemed-repurchased after we sold ourselves to the enemy. We have hope. We have life. Let's celebrate. He is not dead. NO! HE IS ALIVE!!

Apprehension

Yes. This is another introspective piece. We are 8 days away from our departure to Asian adventure, and, suddenly, I am apprehensive. I'm not sure why. I don't know that it's the actual trip so much as the unknown. Everyone keeps asking these questions:
1. What will I do there? I don't know.
2. How will I support my family? I don't know.
3. What about the house we just bought? I don't know.
4. Am I crazy? Probably.
5. Am I scared? Just a bit.
6. Are we really thinking about moving our kids to a very foreign country? Yes.

The answer to the first three questions is the same: I don't know. And there lies the stumbling block, I think. It's so against my nature to not have a game plan. As impulsive as I usually am with the small stuff, I have had a "plan" for the past 15 years. I was going to work at my job, pay into retirement and 401k, keep plugging away day after day, until I turned 60. Then, Heather and I were going to travel and see the world and, hopefully, spoil some grandkids. I was set.

I have a great job with unbelievable benefits. But, for me, there's no passion in it. I literally woke up one morning and the Lord told me that I was supposed to be doing something else. I know I heard correctly. My wife heard the same thing without us talking about it. So why am I having doubts? Because I don't have the plan. God has the plan and he's been giving it to me step by step as I am ready. Yet, I want to know the whole plan. I want to know what to expect. But, if I knew the whole plan, I would stay up at night trying to figure out alternative routes and shortcuts. I would question God's wisdom because that's what I do. I would have the plan so messed up that even God couldn't recognize it. God knows this because He knows me.

I know people think we are crazy. How can we make this decision without a plan? But, think of Abraham. God woke him up one day and told him to take his son, build an altar, and then sacrifice Isaac. Abraham did it! Of course, God gave him the alternate route, but Abraham trusted God to the point that He didn't even question. God had previously promised that Abraham's descendants would be as numerous as the stars. Abraham had already screwed that plan up by having Ishmael. And now, God had finally delivered on his promise and instructed Abraham to destroy that promise? And, Abraham did it! He didn't know the whole plan and apparently wasn't surprised when God provided a different sacrifice.

It comes down to trust. He didn't even ask me to sacrifice a kid. Just a job and a way of life. All He asked of us was to go. That's what we're going to do. We're going for 30 days. After that, we don't have the whole picture. The question is: Do I trust him with the details? Do I take my family, my way of life and go build an altar, trusting that He has the details worked out and that He is true to His promise? Or, do I live in fear and distrust, regretting that I never took the leap?

That's the fork in my road: The unknown and all the promised glory or the familiar and all of it's comfort. I'm choosing...stay tuned.

Five Days Later

I have had a few days to try to process the 8 days we spent in Managua. I was really hoping to come to grips with the emotions and reactions of what we saw there. However, what I have discovered is that I am in a sort of grieving process. Initially, I was shocked and sad. Then, I was outraged. Now, I'm numb. However, the tears can still flow freely when I think about the 450 children we came into contact with. My heart jumps at the thought of going back. I get a huge smile on my face when I think about praising Jesus in Spanish with 3000 other believers I have never met, yet was intricately bonded with.

As I have mentioned before, Nicaragua is a paradox. The hopelessness of poverty is always present and heavy. Young girls under the age of 12 will prostitute themselves to the trash truck drivers at the dump for the opportunity to be first to dig through the trash. Children beg for money at every street corner. I met Udy, a boy about 12, who had been kidnapped and taken to Mexico so that his organs could be sold on the black market. By the pure grace of God, he escaped before he was killed. David, also about 12, was sold by his mom's boyfriend for a $2 crack rock. He was rescued by Wayne and Elaine, wonderful missionaries in Managua.

And yet, the presence of God is everywhere. Udy is in the constant process of healing. He is guarded, but liberal with hugs. David is a born leader and understands the depths of God's love. The Church in Managua is filled with true Christians. They suffer persecution. They give out of nothing. Their joy in the Father is just that. They have trouble, but rely on their Lord to deliver them. While the Church in the US has about a 20/80 tithe rate (that is 20% of believers contribute 80% of the church's budget) the church we visited has an 80% tithe rate. I don't like numbers when it comes to the kingdom of God, but these numbers speak volumes. Those that have much tend to give little and those that have little tend to give much. I am now praying for much that I may give much.

I'm amazed at the way Father put our mission team together. While I knew all 8 of my fellow members, I didn't know them. I have been touched deeply by each one of them. Cheryl, Claudie, Bradley, Brooks, Chad, Jay, Jason, and Russell: How can I thank you for the way you took me in and made me family? I want each of you to know that I thank our Father for you and for the amazing gifts you bring to the table. I know that all week we prayed that we would have Jesus's heart for the people that we met. On Thursday, we learned how dangerous that prayer is. As we walked through a children's cancer hospital, we saw children who were dying in terrible conditions and victims of extremely inadequate medical care. Each one of us was wrecked with sorrow. And yet, as we prayed for these children, there was hope because we felt the Father's love for even the least of these. One image I will never forget is the little two year old girl vomiting on the floor as her mother tried to hold her head up. No bed pan. No nurse. No sheets or pillows on the bed. I was compelled to pray for her. As I did, she relaxed and stopped vomiting. She turned her beautiful eyes up and smiled! I cried and she smiled. Crud. I'm crying now. How much God loves each and every one of us. And how much the children of Nicaragua need to know about His love!

Our friends, Wayne and Elaine MaGouirk and their ministry, Savior's Tear, are truly the hands and feet of Jesus to hundreds of children in Nicaragua. They don't do it for glory. They certainly don't do it for the money (there's no wealth building in missions). They simply do it because God told them to. I'm going to post the link to their ministry at the end. PLEASE visit the page. It is such important work. I have learned over the past few days that our Father blesses those who bless His children. And He certainly blessed me last week.

I think that I can speak for the entire team when I say that we are all forever changed by this trip. Our vision is different and our hearts have been altered. We experienced a compassion unlike I have ever known.

I have made lifelong friends and have met an entirely new family in Central America. Thank you for following our journey. I have linked to Mission 2540, Brooks Boyett's ministry blog as well. He does a great job with it and has a fantastic ministry as well. Please check it out.

Father, thank you that you don't turn away from us. Your love is always present and your grace covers us all. Please help us to recognize the opportunities to be You to others. Help us not to be distracted by our own selfishness and greed. Even the widow gave out of her need. May we give out of our abundance. Amen.

Savior's Tear

Mission 2540

Coming Soon

I've had several people hit me up on Facebook about if or when I am going to blog more about the trip. Honestly, I'm so spent and so much happened that I think it's best if I take a few days and process everything and then post a final thoughts type entry.

However, the China trip is set in stone-we purchased airline tickets last night. Thank you all for your prayers and support for the Nicaragua trip as well as our future in China. Blog soon!!

Hope for a New Day

This has been an emotional ride like I have never known. There is so much to love about the country of Nicaragua-it's beautiful and the people are great. The fact of the matter is, however, there has not been a stable government here in recent history. Most coups tend to take over and then plunder the country for every speck of hope that is left. The average monthly income is between $125 and $150. When you go to the mall, the prices are only slightly lower than American prices. Do the math. The malls are still open, which means somebody is buying, but at $150 US dollars, it's not the average Nicaraguan. The government is the same. The officials are the ones with all the money.

Enough said about that. Today, we started out at a hospital for children with cancer. It was so powerful to pray for these kids and watch the Father fill them up with hope. It was moving to see the mothers with tears in their eyes looking at their children and realizing that there really is hope in sorrow. The hospital is a terrible place. There is no doubt that the staff does all it can for the kids, but it's a socialized system and they have NO supplies. While we were there, we saw a young boy who had fallen out off a tree and had massive head injuries. He didn't have cancer, but they don't have a head trauma facility. His system was shutting down and he needed an enema, but the doctor said there are no enemas at the hospital. In fact, they have very few supplies at all. We bought the enema from a pharmacy for this boy. Not to get political here, but this is what you get when you have national health care. No government can run it efficiently and free of corruption. The result is understaffed, under skilled, under equipped, overworked health care systems and children die in the fallout.

This afternoon was one of the most incredible times I've had here. We went to an orphanage that has around 30 kids. I wanted to take every one of them home.. They were so full of life and joy and love. Just another time when I was blessed by the ones I thought I was going to help. After playing all afternoon, we had some worship time with them. As we were about to leave, the kids all gathered up and began to thank us and prophesy over us. It was incredibly moving and sweet. I can never get enough of those hugs.

This country is a paradox. On one corner is the specter of human trafficking. Across the street miracles are taking place and hope is being born. I'm going to leave a huge part of my heart here when I leave.

Please take the time to check out http://www.saviorstear.com. This is an incredible ministry here and is run by some fantastic, Godly people.

Actually, it's Day 3

Today was the last day of our time at the school in Managua. I came here with the lofty idea that I had blessings to give these children. However, they are the ones with so much to offer. They are smart, funny, energetic and just amazing. In fact, I am the one who has been blessed beyond measure by these little lights.
What is most amazing to me is the fact that these kids are throw-aways. I can't understand how these kids can be ignored. Wayne and Elaine are doing a phenominal job at Escuela Christiana Oasis de Esperanza. They are educating a new generation of warriors. I'm not a socialist by any means, but the government here has failed the people and so have we as the Church.
I don't know what you're doing right now, but if you ask me (and you did, didn't you?) you should find a way to get some supplies or money or your butt down here.
"Not me" you say? I say, "Who, then?"
If we can't help even the least of these, then what good are we to the kingdom of God? That's right-I said it. Tell me what good? I didn't want to preach or lecture, but our level of assistance as the richest "Christian" people in the world is pitiful. I meant pathetic. I'm also at fault. We all are. I hear you now..."We can't save everybody". Oh YES, we can!! We have never tried because we are too fat, lazy, slothful, confortable and selfish. I'm going to throw arrogant in here too, because I'm talking to myself also. Sorry if this offends you (not really), but I need to be offended and so do you. Don't want to come to Central America? In Amarillo, there are people living under overpasses downtown by Faith City Mission. I know because I drive past them every day and thank God that I'm not one of them. Can you get downtown for a while and speak to them? Pray with them? Feed or clothe them? I'm dead serious. Can you? More to the point-WILL YOU?

I'll try to make the next post happier, but I can't promise anything.

Father, give us your heart for ALL people, regardless of who they are. Show us how you love them as much as you love us. Open our hearts to you and your desire for us to be your hands and feet.

Day 1 recap

Today was the most amazing day. It's so incredible how loving these kids are. I'm not ministering as much as these kids are ministering to me. They have no idea they are missing anything and the more time I spend with them, I realize that I am the one who's missing something. Love, compassion, contentment. They have it all.

We took a tour of the dump ground where most of these kids live and find their meals. The city will often dump the garbage on the sidewalks of this neighborhood so the residents can go through it before it is burned. I didn't take pictures of the dump because we felt it would be disrespectful. I don't want people taking pics of my house...Anyway, it left quite an impression on us. Most of the children at the school show up everyday in clean clothes and combed hair (although they may not leave the school that way because they are kids, after all) and we are amazed that the parents can get these kids so clean in such horrendous conditions.

I love my kids with all my heart. I never knew I had any more room to love more, but today, 300 more kids stole my heart.

Day 1

Arrived in Managua yesterday. When we landed, the first thing we noticed were all the crashed and disabled aircraft littering the side to the runway. Ghostly. And the city has proven to be ghostly as well. The presence of God is very strong here, but so is the evil. I feel one bolstered and ready on one side and like I'm about to be torn apart on the other side. The spiritual battle is very thick here. I imagine that it is not unlike Haiti. And yet, everywhere I look, I see the love of the Father on these people and I feel him crying for them. As Isaiah said, "I am undone!"

I have no idea what this week holds, but I do know that the Father did not send me here to be me. I must walk in the spirit every second that I am here or I will fall victim to an attack of the enemy.

I ask that if you read this, pray that we have the eyes of the Father to see the Nicaraguan people as he does, His wisdom to discern what is from Him and what is not, His heart to love the ones that are around us, and His power that we may spread the kingdom with every step that we take.

Countdown to Nicaragua

I'm going to be quite a globe-trotter this year. In addition to going to China, I am going to Nicaragua next month. We will be working in a very poor part of Managua at a Christian School. I'm hoping to be able to blog from there at least every other day. I'm excited at what the Lord is going to do.

Please be in prayer for our missions team. Pray that we stay healthy, united, and that the Father uses us to show the Nicaraguan people his love.

A City on a Hill

Matthew 5:13-16

"You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt loses its flavor, how shall it be seasoned? It is then good for nothing but to be thrown out and trampled underfoot by men.
You are the light of the world. A city that is set on a hill cannot be hidden.
Nor do they light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a lampstand, and it gives light to all who are in the house.
Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven."

I love this passage. The thought of a city on a hill, in the darkest of night, is amazing. I often have the opportunity to approach Amarillo from the north on many nights. You can see it from 40 miles away. It cannot be hidden. It is a beacon that lets me know I will soon be home.

This is one of those passages that many of us have heard all our lives. Sermon after sermon has been preached on it. But how many of us incorporate this into our lives? For most of us, the extent of being salt or light ends when we leave the sanctuary. We say things like, "What a great message" or "The spirit was heavy today" and then walk out hoping to survive another week in a fallen world. But I say that our calling is a little bigger than that. Even Satan spends time in the presence of God (see the story of Job). Even the demons confess that Christ is Lord. What truly separates us from this sinful world? I submit that it isn't parking our rears in a pew. In fact, parking is the last thing we should be doing!!

Don't hear what I'm not saying. I'm not saying that we shouldn't go to church. We should! We need to be with like-minded believers as often as we can. But, we are the light of the world. What good does it do for us to carry the light of Jesus in us if we hide it in a church building? Do my co-workers see the hope of Christ in me or do they just see me? I'm sad to say that they usually see me. How sad is that? I have the key to saving this lost world and I keep it to myself! I know many people who confess Christ in one breath and talk about enjoying the sin of this world in the next. I have done it myself many times.

We are so worried about what our friends might think of us if we share the good news with them that we keep it inside! What kind of friends are we to others when we do that? Here's the hard part of this lesson: when we fail to share Jesus, we are trying to please man and not the Father. But, Jesus says we cannot serve two masters. We must choose. And the scripture is clear that there are only two sides to choose. You know what I'm saying here. It stinks. There's no middle ground here? No, there's no middle ground. I've heard all my life that life is about compromise. I'm learning that that's a lie. There is no compromise in the Kingdom. There is only choice and sacrifice or choice and consequence.

I'm finding that there is joy in the sacrifice. It's an oxymoron. As I learn to let the ways of the world go, I find joy in the presence of the Father. I don't always find happiness. Happiness is circumstantial, but joy is everlasting.

Aren't we all called to go into the world and make disciples of the nations? I didn't read any clause that said "if you are a pastor" or "if you are a theological genius". It just says to go. I'm not saying you have to go to Africa or India or Iran. Last time I checked, the United States is a nation. And the great thing is, we don't even have to pack.

There's a haunting question here. Are we going to be obedient and share the light or are we going to choose the other side of the coin and keep it to ourselves?

First Things First

It's been a while-I know. As I've said before, I'm not terribly consistent when it comes to blogging. However, much has happened. First of all, our church is sending a missions team to Nicaragua next month. Heather and I have decided that it would be beneficial for me to go. I wanted to go anyway, but we feel like I need to get my feet wet in missions and this week-long trip is a great opportunity to do that. I would like to ask anyone that reads this to please pray for me. Because of our plans to go to China and the initial expense involved, not to mention that the economic downturn has adversely affected my job, we don't have a large cash reserve sitting around. I believe that God will provide the funds and I know that I live in a Kingdom economy rather than the world economy. So we are praying...please pray with us! More importantly, the people we will be working with (mostly children) live in deplorable conditions. They need Jesus! Pray that everyone in our group will be Jesus to these kids.

I took a couple of years of Spanish in college. Nearly 20 years later, I haven't really ever used Spanish, so I'm a little rusty, to say the least! But the the other night, I was on a train and started asking the Lord for the ability to speak Spanish and everything I learned back then came flooding back. I hated that class, but now am glad I took it! I have enough knowledge now that I could get by without a full-time interpreter. Dr. Brown, if you ever come across this blog-THANK YOU!

We have nailed down a tentative plan to go to China in April. We are very excited. We have begun Rosetta Stone Mandarin and have labels all over the house with the chinese words that represent the things that are labeled. For example, the water dispenser on the fridge is labeled shui (water). It is great fun, but I find the language to be particularly daunting. My children, however, are learning fast. Oh to be young and sponge-like again.

My last request for this post is that you pray for clarity of purpose for us. We have our heart set on a certain part of China, but want what the Lord wants for us. We don't want to be so set on one place that we miss his direction. As I have said before, it seems like everything is being set in place and I know that's true. We just want the vision to see what is really being set in place-not what we want to see.

Thanks to all for the encouragement and prayers. Know that when we go, we carry you all in our hearts and therefore, you will be there also! Praise be to our Father who was and is and is to come!!!

Passports!!

By the end of the month, we will have everyone's passports for the journey!! Quite incredible! We actually didn't have the money to get everyone's passports all at once, but an incredible donation from some very dear friends made it possible. Without going back and reading (I can't remember if I mentioned this), we haven't even begun to seek out funds. We actually plan on NEVER asking for money because we believe that God will provide for every step. Once again, He proves his promises will be kept. A dear friend stopped by yesterday and handed Heather a check that will cover the kids' passports and our visas! I'm completely speechless (not literally).
The hard part about the next few months will be the waiting. I am so excited about the future and so ready to leave everything I've known behind. It's a strange thing to say and an even stranger thing to feel. I'm ready to go. Every day that passes, I am less attached to everything around me.
On a completely different note, tonight is the last night of Chanukah. One last candle until next year. I am blown away by the blessings this year has seen and so expectant of what is to come. Just as Chanukah celebrates liberation and restoration of the temple and the miracle of more than enough oil, we celebrate the fact that Father has given us more than enough oil in a vessel that looks too small.
Isn't that what Jesus is really all about? Taking people who haven't got enough and making them into more? Most of the time, I feel like I have nothing to offer, then He steps in and gives me something for someone else. Just enough oil!
I'm a terribly sporadic blogger, so if this is the last one for a while, Merry Christmas and a blessed new year.

The Mystery Solved

As promised, here is the story of how Heather and I realized where we were called to go. Now, if you pay careful attention, you will figure out where it is. I know this is a little vague, but it has to be out of necessity. How wonderful it is to have a dream and watch it come true. Can you imagine seeing the Lord work right before your eyes?
Heather and I have a real interest in all things Jewish. We pray for Jerusalem and for peace in the region. We have celebrated Passover the past two years. Last year, we celebrated Hanukkah instead of Christmas. So, naturally, when we began to realize we were going into missions, we assumed it would be in Israel. We started looking into Rosetta Stone Hebrew lessons and making all kinds of grand plans. Then, God stepped in.
I began seeing snapshots of certain Asian landmarks in my mind. I didn't think anything about it until Heather had a dream. She told me her dream in which she was in an Asian country and Asian soldiers put her under house arrest and told her, "You thought you were prepared for us. But really, we were prepared for you." It was the same Asian country that I had been seeing in my mind. I told her about the visions. Let me break to say that she had told a few people about her dream before she told me and they all said, "You are going to this Asian country." So when Heather and I talked, it became obvious where we were meant to go.
We then told our pastor and elders what the Lord has shown us. We have placed our dream in the hands of our church so that when it seems good to us and them for us to go, the church will send us out.
The amazing thing is that we haven't told a lot of people, but many of our friends are coming up to us saying, "We have a feeling you're going to be leaving. What's going on?" We haven't even begun to plan or figure out funding, yet people are asking us how they can contribute financially! God is really putting all of this into place right before our eyes!
Having said all of this, we are planning a month long trip to a certain Asian country in the spring to meet the people and work with them, see the sights and get a feel for the country. After that...well, we don't know yet. We expect that God will go before us and make straight the path that we are to take. Please join us in praying for those that we encounter in that region and that the Lord's favor will be on us.
As for where we are going-if you haven't figured it out yet, pm me on Facebook and I will give more details.

Happy Thanksgiving...EveryDay

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone! I have never been a fan of Thanksgiving. I just never really got into it. This year, however, I am inexplicably excited. I want to encourage everyone to think beyond what you are thankful for in the present and be grateful for what the Father is going to do in the future. When it comes to thankfulness, we always look to the past and present, but how often do we look to the future? God is always looking to the future! In the womb, we were fearfully and wonderfully made for his purpose-created for an eternal future. But we were also created to bring the Kingdom to this earth.
He has plans to prosper us! Of course He has blessed us in the past and He blesses us at this moment. But I believe that there is a stirring among his children and we must look for it.
Father, I am thankful Your life-giving love. Expand your Kingdom through your believers! I am thankful for what you are about to do among your people! Open eyes and ears and rend hearts. You are the God of healing and peace. Thank you that we have hope for the future!!

History-Part 1

My sweet wife says I actually should start from the beginning rather than start from the present. With that in mind, I will try to lay a little background as to how this journey began.
I grew up in church. I remember missionaries coming on occasional Sunday nights to give "reports from the field". I was never interested in them-not even the slideshows. I was too self-absorbed to care. Although I was saved at the age of 11, I didn't begin to have a true relationship with Father until a few years ago. Wow! Over 20 years as a Christian before I really began to know the person in whom I professed my faith.
My wife grew up in the mission field. She has some incredible memories of the Philippines. A few months ago, the Lord began showing me snapshots of me being a missionary. It was a shock and I didn't understand it. I didn't even know if I wanted what I thought he was showing me. I told my wife that the Lord had showed me something (but not what) and I wanted her to ask Him to show her too. Well, He did! She came to me a few days later and said that He told her we were going into the mission field. It was confirmation of the most solid kind.
And so, the ongoing discussion began: "Will we? Can we? When? Where? How? REALLY?" We had no information-just a dream. And we didn't tell anyone except each other. A few weeks ago, a man named Norman Barnes from the UK came to our church. Norman has lived an amazing life in missions and preaching the gospel. I had never met Norman personally until he asked Heather and me to stand before the church as he often does. He gave us this word (paraphrased): "The Lord says,'Yes, but not yet. You have much to learn and you need all the training and covering you can get from your church family. Then, when it is right with the leaders and you, this group will send you'."
Seriously? This guy just opened up our mailbox and read our mail! What a sweet and definite confirmation from the Father! As if that weren't enough, He woke me up at 6:08 yesterday morning. I often find that He will wake me up at a certain time and that time relates to a passage of scripture-usually in Isaiah. Isaiah 6:8: "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'" Crazy? You just can't make this stuff up!!
So, there's some history. Wait until you hear how he showed us where we are going.
But, that will have to wait. I am tired and must get some sleep.
Thank you, Father, for speaking to us even when we don't think we hear you. Thank you for pursuing us with your desire to heal us and prosper us. To you all glory flows and from you all love and peace flows. You are GOOD!! Remind your people of your mighty ways and remind your beloved of their value and worth in your kingdom!

GO!

My first ever blog post. This should be a lot of fun. In the months to come, I hope to relate what's going on in my journey with the Father and how he keeps his promises. He has been doing some truly incredible things in the last few weeks and I would love to share all of it, but it would simply take too long. I will probably incorporate some of those things in future posts as they will have an impact on my family's future.
This blog is meant to praise my Holy Father, call attention to His will in your life (as well as mine), to proclaim His providence and glory, and hopefully, encourage and spur others on to draw closer to Him.
I would ask that you would pray with me for the believers in a certain Asian country that we won't name. My hope is that through this post, a worldwide group will begin praying for God's kingdom to spread in this region.
That's enough for now. Blessings on you and your families and praise be to the Father, Lion of Judah! Roar, Daddy, roar!!